Ask the expert:
I have an attractive offer for a promotion, but it includes a move to another city. How can I get my wife on board?
If you and your family are well settled in your present location, moving can be a complicated step. But more companies today are asking their people to relocate. A study by Atlas Van Lines shows that 61 percent of those who declined a far-flung job cited family issues as a reason.
That doesn't mean you have to be one of them. Peter Pearson, a psychologist and co-founder of the Couples Institute in Menlo Park, Calif., says how you present the option to move will help you and your spouse decide whether it's right for you.
Before you start the talk, know all the details about what support package the company is offering to help with the transition. Companies pay for moving expenses and some give a moving bonus of thousands of dollars to top it off. But don't rush to conclusions. Take a week or two to think about it.
* Share the decision. Say you've been offered the new job and are wondering whether it would be a good choice for you and the family. It lets your mate know her opinion carries weight.
* Show empathy. Say you know it will be difficult for her to give up her own job and move away from her brother and sisters. Telling the downside keeps her from developing a negative reply.
* Tell the benefits. Explain that the promotion is important to you and that the new town has many companies, so she could get a good job as well.
* Make a visit. Take a weekend off to explore the town. Visit with a real estate agent; check out the schools and investigate the job market for her.
* Add up the numbers. Include your new salary and perks, but check with a financial planner. Or use a cost-of-living tool, like the one at bankrate.com to make sure your raise won't be eaten up by higher taxes or home prices.